He MUST be desperate.

Dear Harry,

I think my head might be boxier than Matt Damon's.

But... Don't tell your friends, okay?

Love,
James Van Der Beek

Maybe he should try saying "please"...

 Dear Harry,

Give me your boots, your clothes, and your dead godfather's motorcycle.

Seriously.  I'm about to be out of a job, and I'm gonna need all the help I can get.

Love,
The Governator

MATT DAMON GO FAST 2!!!!!!!!!

 Hairee Poddur -

MATT DAMON have new flickery thing!!!!

~GO SEE MATT DAMON EAT JUJUBEES!!~

MATT DAMON luv HAIREE PODDUR!  :))))))))) :)))))!!!!!!1


MATT DAMON=

MATT DAMON!!!

Poor Supes.

Dear Harry,

So.  I've been kind of broke lately (you know, recession and all that), and I had this job interview for a position writing for this thing called a "blog" -- Lois set it up for me when The Planet laid off all their staff writers -- and I figured it'd be a good idea to get some new clothes.

Anyway, since cash is tight, I thought I'd use a gift card for this place called, "Urban Outfitters," that I've had lying around for awhile.  Next thing I know, people keep telling me it's "Twilight," asking if I'm a "vegan," and if I'm planning on moving to some place called "Williamsburg."

What gives?

Love,
Superman

P.S. Who the fuck is Edward Cullen???

Delores thought it was a good idea...

Dear Harry,

Sorry for shooting that issue of The Quibbler with a picture of your face on the cover in my last TV ad. 

I really needed the votes.

Love,
Cornelius Fudge

Act before you think...

Dear Harry,

Your recent statement, "When I see Dementors board
the same cart as mine on the Hogwarts Express, I get nervous,"
is racist and has caused us to reconsider your ability to freely
listen to us.

Love,
Vivian Schiller
NPR President

Journalistic integrity?

Dear Harry,

I was fired from NPR, too.

Love,
Rita Skeeter

He's just some squib...

Dear Harry,

Seriously, who the fuck is Edward Cullen?

Love,
Cedric Diggory

Good luck betting on the Quidditch Cup this year...

Dear Harry,

Despite my uncanny ability to predict the outcomes of World Cup football matches, I, like the emperor, could not foresee my own death.

Love,
Paul

Touchy, touchy...

Dear Harry,

Don't violate me.

Love,
The Prime Directive

In Pog form!

Dear Harry,

Where the FUCK ARE MY ALF POGS?!?!?!?!?!?

Seriously,
Milhouse Van Houten

Surf dudes with attitudes...

Dear Harry,

Please ignore the lyrics to our theme song and wake us
up if we're dreamin'. We do A LOT of drugs and may be
OD-ing. Thanks.

Love,
California Dreams