I wouldn't fuck with this guy.

Dear Harry,

Please inform that pitiful excuse for a "Dark Lord," Voldermort, that it's rather imperative that he return my face now.  Also, the whole "slits-for-nose" look is completely unflattering on him.

Love,
THE Dark Lord, Venger

It's getting old, boy who lived...

Dear Harry,

Yeah, yeah...you got me, but I am NOT falling for it again. I know that you have not actually "got" my nose...I just wish I could remember where I put the bloody thing.

Love,
The Dark Lord, Voldemort